Questions you may ask yourself.

And other useless information from the world of JP

Q: How do you entertain 3 drunk guys for at least half and hour?

A: Give them an oversized beach ball and send them to the yard. Trust me it will get loud in a matter of minutes.

Last night, after having a few drinks at a couple bars, it was time to go home. It had been a pretty uneventful night really. The first bar include a bull ride and at the second bar, a cherry bomb was served. Unfortunately, it seems everyone was recovering from Halloween, cause both establishments were almost completely empty.

The night would not pickup until we found an oversized beach ball just sitting in the middle of the road. We just had to have it, and pulled over for the object of our desires. This thing was huge I'm telling you. I literally was 4 times as wide as I was. We had to deflate it about a 1/4 of the way, just to get it in the car.

We got the ball back to the house, and before I know it... the three of us had started I'm gonna hit you with this thing in the mouth or tackle you free for all right there on the front lawn.

For the next 30 minutes it was like this. The ball flying. Recon Man tackling Mr. TG, and then Recon Man getting attacked by the ball after he gets up.

I ended up with a fat lip and a bruise on my leg. Don't know about the other guys.

Q: How do you tell if a guy is drunk or just acting crazy?

A: Go down the street at 25 MPH after finding a beachball on the side of road and stop suddenly. And see how he reacts after his head hits the windshield.

If things get serious... He was acting crazy. If he laughs... He's drunk. As was the case when Mr. TG head hit the windshield. Not only did he hit his head, there is evidence of it to this very moment in the form of a spiderweb of cracks. Yet after he hit it, he was laughing and offering to pay for it immediately after it happened.

I'm telling you, dude has a hard head.

More WTF?!

I'm glad I meet your approval... That was sarcasm in case you didn't know.

Last night I went out with my boys Recon Man and Mr. TG to Cafe when the unthinkable happens, my ex walks right next to us and says "O Hi guys".

Talk about awkward!!! I'm talking, pit in the stomach now feeling like I have 30 lbs of something in there awkward. That feeling didn't last long when I was whisked right past her, VIP status and walked right in while she had to pay whatever cover charge there is. What was even better, was seeing from the corner of my eye, her paying $6 for whatever drink she was having, while I could of just told them what I wanted and have it delivered to me at no charge. (I was the DD last night, so I didn't).

The rest of the night there was minimal interaction. I did say hi and wave, but not much else.

Then without warning or even provocation, I get a text from her.

"You look good. I'm proud of you"

WTF?!?! You're proud of me?! Back the f*ck up!! At what point in our lives, did I start seeking the approval of her? My dad told me he was proud of me once. That meant something. But to tell me that I look good and you are proud of me, indicates that this person thinks that I became this guy: