Looking up to a Pea

Doesn't look so good from down here.
"If he calls me one more time, I'm seriously thinking about going in there and smacking him!!!"

I felt so big and bad and yet aggravated at that time. I saw it in my head. The phone would ring. He'd say something that would just set me off my rocker and then I'd walk over there calmly, collected. I'd look him dead in the eye, and say "You've pissed me off for the last time old man!" Swing away and then proceed to walk right out the front door proud that I had done it, realizing that my job was just lost.

Apparently God didn't like that idea.

Less than 3 seconds after I made that statement to my co-worker, guess who called. That's right, The Devil himself. There he was ready to pounce. Knowing that he finally had his chance to get rid of me, he was going to say something really fierce. Something so upsetting, that even a "Crips vs. Bloods" gang fight would look tame. IFC eat your heart out, the July 10 massacre was about to start!!

Then the words no one with boiling red blood ever wants to hear are uttered.

"Hey John, just wanted to say thanks for your help"

NO!!!!!!!!!! Don't say that!!!

All of a sudden I went from Andre the Giant (Big, Bad, Hairy) to Chicken Little (short and small).

How could you?!